Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Blood Oath

This is my contribution to the Three Word Wednesday prompt for the week. Hope y'all like it!


Carl pledged vengeance, an oath he reiterated each time he stuck his knife in a man whose ineptitude had played a part in his father’s death.

Employing a cunning deceit, he finally found the last of the group. Wanting to indulge his blood lust, he slowly withdrew the blade from the man’s side before plunging it in again, just a few inches closer to the bastard’s heart.

“Nothing like surgical precision is there, Doc?” he quipped, smiling into the dying eyes of his father’s killer.

13 comments:

ThomG said...

Well. You know I love dark and this is good. One gets the feeling that surgeons ended the antagonist's dad's life. And interesting twist.

One critique - try and eliminate using -ing wording. I think it gets in the way of most stories. Personal preference (that was beaten into me by a writing mentor in college).

Angel said...

Thanks, Thom. I have heard that before about ing words, I just keep forgetting! I will try and improve on that part of my writing!

Lucy said...

ooooh so much death on 3 ww today!
very nicely done! I bet many would want to kill a doc that was responsible for a loved ones death.
I appreciate Thoms tip too! I had never heard that but will try to remember!

pia said...

Love how it ended. I disagree with Thom about the "ing" in this particular piece "Employing" works as does "wanting"

Witchmojo said...

Ah Angel, when I need death and destruction I know I can always rely on you my friend ;)
Another superb little scene and you can really feel his pleasure as he deals with those responsible for the death of his father.

Angel said...

Thanks, y'all.

I know, Witch, my hubby says I'm twisted...lol. I need to write something happy again soon.

sudharm baxi said...

So much said in so few words..
And pretty dark too..

maglomaniac said...

Well I personally try not to use 'ing' but I never can lay my hands of her.
Morbidity of a killer.Vengence reached

~Harsha

SweetTalkingGuy.. said...

Yeah this is pretty dark and I felt that blade, ouch!

gautami tripathy said...

You plunge it right. Loved it...

gyrating on its own steam of oath

lissa said...

I suppose he didn't believe in forgive and forgot?

btw, I didn't notice the -ing excess usage, maybe because I do it too, it's a habit that's hard to break

Ann (bunnygirl) said...

Sounds messy, but an oath is an oath, right?

Pretty Me!! said...

gripping !! i liked it :)